Begging for Serenity
by Blousey
Summary: Lucy/Mina. One-shot. Lucy finally tells Mina how she feels, only to find out Mina already knows.


"Mina, I-I like you." Lucy whirled around, eyes watching Mina from her place on the other side of the room. Mina lowered her eyes but said nothing. "I'm fond of you in a way that is absolutely and completely inappropriate! You're my dearest friend, Mina, and I-" Lucy threw her hands up in exasperation. She had no idea if Mina understood what she was trying to say at all or if she thought it was simply more pleasantries from her adoring blonde friend. "More than… more than a friend should like a friend. I-"

"I know."

"What?" Lucy's eyes widened as Mina's words made her heartbeat speed up. "S-Surely you're joking."

Mina pursed her lips and shook her head, finally lifting her gaze to meet Lucy's.

Lucy was torn between immense relief and anger at Mina for keeping it to herself all this time. "How long?"

"How long…?" Mina tilted her head in question.

"How long have you known?" Lucy's voice was no more than a whisper. Her heart was pounding, her eyes were darting. Honestly, she was surprised she had managed to talk around the lump in her throat.

A sigh slipped from Mina's lips, hand cupping her forehead as she struggled to respond. "A.. A long time, Lucy. Years, perhaps?"

Lucy scoffed in disbelief. Years. Mina had known this entire time and never said anything at all about it! Worse than that, she had never stopped being affectionate despite knowing how Lucy felt. Lucy turned away from Mina to gather her thoughts. She was angry and upset and nervous and, a-and… _betrayed._

How many countless nights had Mina invited Lucy into her bed while being fully aware of what that would do to her? Did Mina hear the way Lucy's heartbeat would jump when Mina's head rested on her chest? Did she not believe Lucy when she had passed it off as being a side effect of the alcohol?

Lucy didn't know what to think anymore. She felt uneasy and very much like her life had been turned upside down. This long-held secret of hers wasn't really a secret at all, in the end, and her worrying and pining after Mina and gathering of courage for this very moment were for naught.

"Lucy, please, let me explain." Mina approached Lucy carefully, not wanting to make her any more rattled than she already was. Lucy sniffled but didn't try to escape the gentle hold Mina had on her arm.

"Please, Lucy, look at me." Lucy sniffed again and brought a hand up to wipe at her eyes but didn't face Mina.

Mina nodded at the silence that followed and dropped her arm. "I suppose that's fair treatment. But Lucy, you must understand that I had no intention to hurt you," she pleaded. "I didn't feel it was my place to expose you, to make you feel as if you were vulnerable. Y-You put on this front for everyone and it keeps you safe, and I couldn't take that away from you. Do you understand?" Lucy remained silent. "I thought leaving it up to you would be the best course of action, and Lucy, I am so, _so_ sorry if it wasn't. If I did hurt you, please know that it was all born out of a stupid, naive belief that I was doing the right thing. Please."

Lucy finally looked back at Mina and saw the shiny glint of unshed tears welling up in her eyes. She was truly apologetic and although Lucy was indeed hurt, she could see the regret written on Mina's face.

"You had to tell me when you were ready," Mina finished, eyes searching Lucy's for even a shred of forgiveness.

Lucy sighed. This was exhausting and difficult and it felt like all the years she had held back her feelings were suddenly bearing down on her at once. "You couldn't have, I don't know, said something? Helped me find the words?"

"Would you have wanted me to?"

This caused Lucy to pause. If Mina had approached her before Lucy herself had come to peace with the part of her that hopelessly longed for her closest friend, she likely would have reacted poorly. "No, I suppose not," she conceded.

Mina reached for Lucy's hands, causing Lucy to fully face her, and rubbed her thumbs across the top of Lucy's hands absently. "Thank you for telling me. I can't tell you how long I have watched you and waited for this moment, for you to be ready."

"So you have watched me," Lucy mused.

Mina's laughter echoed in the room. "Of course I have." She tried to read Lucy's expression but was only able to sense her confusion.

"Oh, Lucy, sweetheart," Mina chuckled, resting one hand on Lucy's cheek. "You haven't the slightest clue, have you?" The blonde shook her head. "I feel the exact same way as you do."

"But Harker-"

"Is a good man," Mina finished for her. "I just never imagined you would come to realize how you really felt. I didn't want to scare you with something you weren't ready for, and Jonathan… Jonathan is very kind and has always showed great interest in me." Lucy blinked at her. "Lucy, a girl can't wait around forever, you know," Mina teased with a smile. She hoped to bring some lightness to their heavy conversation but she feared Lucy was being assaulted with too much information in such a short period for their talk to be anything but serious.

"I-" Lucy was speechless. Her heart soared to know that Mina felt romantically toward her as well. This knowledge helped Lucy put into context a lot of aspects of their relationship over the years and finally everything was starting to _click_. Lucy exhaled her delight with a small laugh. "What happens now?"

Mina grinned and moved her hands down to hold onto the inner edges of Lucy's jacket. "You kiss me."


End file.
